For those that help stop or prevent fighting or any kind of bullying. If you need some advice on how to deal with bullying, try our suggestions below:
1. Understand the bullying
Bullying is a learned behavior. There are several reasons why people bully others; more often than not, bullying can be a coping mechanism for people who are going through a stressful situation and it may be learned from abuse or prejudice-based attitudes at home. Often people who bully are currently or have at some point been bullied themselves. Other reasons for bullying include jealousy and insecurity. If you are being bullied, please do not be a victim, you are NOT the problem. If you are bullying somebody else, please speak up about it – help is available.
2. If you feel safe enough: speak to the person who is bullying you
Have you ever said something to a friend and upset them by accident? Chances are, it has probably happened loads of times. It's a similar thing with bullying as the definition, by default is subjective – meaning that everybody has a different threshold of what they consider to be bullying. Sometimes, the person who is bullying you may genuinely have no idea that it is affecting you. Equally, they are probably going through a difficult time themselves and will relate to how you're feeling. Speaking to the person who is bullying you can be really effective.
3. Never go through it in silence
When you're going through a stressful or difficult situation, it can clog your mind and fog your vision. This leads to people becoming distracted, stressed and unproductive. Bullying is something that affects the majority of people but alarmingly, we find that 45% of those who experience it fail to report it through embarrassment, fear or a lack of faith in support systems. It is incredibly important that you go through the appropriate reporting channels by firstly telling a teacher/parent/guardian/learning mentor or another responsible adult. Even if you don't want to report it, speak to somebody and don't feel like you have to go through it alone because you don't.
4. Is it a crime?
Did you know that bullying is a criminal offense? It is up to you to decide upon how serious you perceive the bullying, but if somebody physically or sexually attacks you, uses prejudice language towards you or shares your private information or images online – these are all key signs that you should probably report it to the Police.
5. Don't see yourself as the problem
The reason people experience bullying is not because of their sexuality, gender identity, race, appearance, disability or any other unique factor; it is because of the attitude towards the factor. The only thing possible to change is attitudes. The person who is bullying you is the one with the issue, not you.
6. Deal with stress
When you are going through a stressful situation, it can be difficult to deal with it objectively if you keep it all to yourself. The stress navigates towards the front of your mind and builds up into a completely avoidable chain of negative emotions. It is therefore incredibly important to tell somebody that you trust; it doesn't even have to be an adult, it could be a friend or somebody in your family.
7. Even though you may want to, don't isolate yourself
Depriving yourself from any sort of support certainly isn't going to resolve the issue. We know it may feel like the best thing to do at the time, but it will only make things worse by silencing you and reducing your self-esteem. Often people who are bullied slip into a victim status and see themselves as victims. It's important that you look beyond that and don't let the bullying dictate who you are. Talk about it.
8. Look after your health
We're not going to go into the whole endorphin thing because you've probably heard it before – but seriously, eating a good, clean diet and working out can really improve your physical and mental health and reduce stress. Reductions in stress increase your clarity and break down difficult situations, making them much easier to deal with. Other things you can try include meditation, yoga, cooking, running and swimming. We ALL have mental health, but why is it that everybody focuses more heavily on physical than mental? The fact of the matter is: we all have ups and downs and statistically 1 in 4 of us will experience some sort of mental health complication such as depression or anxiety. It is completely fine and okay to speak up about these issues and it is important that you seek emotional and mental health support from your GP, a therapist or counselor.
9. Seek role models
When you're going through your teen years, sometimes it can all seem like a bit of a black hole. It's made even worse if you're struggling with your identity or being bullied. This is why it is important to seek out positive role models to show you that plenty of people have been where you are right now and have managed to overcome it.
10. Find support
There are hundreds of resources that are either just a click or call away. This is one of those situations where getting online to find help is something we strongly encourage.
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